America cannot handle breasts.

What I mean is, we’re only allowed to have a PG-13 relationship with them. Something like: “we acknowledge that they exist. But we don’t want to talk about them. And we most definitely don’t want to see them.”

(Bear in mind the national standstill that took place when Janet Jackson’s breast was briefly exposed during the 2004 Super Bowl halftime show).

Even though October is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month, sending an effective message to the public can be a daunting task. Usually the country drenches itself in various shades of pink to state the following:

The American Cancer Society reports that an estimated 192,370 new cases of invasive breast cancer will be diagnosed in women in the United States this year alone. Out of that number, an estimated 40,170 women are expected to die from breast cancer in 2009.

Today there are about 2.5 million breast cancer survivors living in the United States.

And according to the Canadian Cancer Society, breast cancer is the most common cancer affecting Canadian women. More than 100 Canadian women die of breast cancer each week. One in nine women is expected to develop breast cancer in her lifetime, and one in 28 will die of it.

Although normally considered an older woman’s disease, breast cancer is the leading cause of cancer death in women between the age of 20 and 49.

In recent years, to reach a younger audience and raise awareness in men, the increasing bluntness of breast cancer campaigns have played with Americans’ generally neurotic relationship to the female anatomy.

Some examples: “Save Second Base” (www.save2ndbase.com), “Save the Ta Tas” (www.savethetatas.com), General Mills Yoplait pledge to end breast cancer (www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYv-1W0o7c4), and a Men Want Boobs PSA (www.youtube.com/watch?v=oh-i4CDNTeA&feature=player-embedded#) that states: “If men had breasts, they’d really appreciate them/ Show yours some TLC./ Touch. Look. Check.”

The most recent PSA, created by the Toronto-based breast-cancer group Rethink Breast Cancer charity (www.rethinkbreastcancer.com), has launched a new and “extreme” campaign: “Save the Boobs.”

You can go to www.buzzfeed.com/awesomer/save-the-boobs-cci to watch the clip.

Or … here’s a PG-13 description: this one-minute spot features MTV News host Aliva-Jasmine Sovani strutting poolside in a white bikini top. Men stare at her, all smiles, including a cadre of dancing gay sailors, while other (flat-chested and/or elderly) women cast disapproving glances at one another.

The tagline reads: “You know/ You like them / Now it’s time / To save the boobs.”

The commercial was advertising an annual event called The Booby Ball (www.boobyball.com) a cruise line for a “raucous one-night voyage” to raise proceeds for breast cancer research. Their mission is “To inspire a new generation of young philanthropists to get involved and create a future without breast cancer.”

Many believe that such “shock ads” are a popular way to draw attention and proceeds to breast-cancer charities.

The ads have definitely caught the attention of critics who say the footage is distracting to the message.

Two weeks ago, ABC aired a segment questioning the ad’s effectiveness. They questioned whether playing up the desirability of full breasts would make cancer patients with mastectomy scars sensitive, and whether the messages based on objectifying women would do more harm than good in the long run.

According to some feminist groups such as www.community.feministing.com, on top of it being problematic to sexualize cancer, implying that only hot girls with nice racks are worth caring about, the PSA is offensive to young men because it implies that men only care about breasts, and not the women behind the breasts.

I agree with all the above: breast cancer is a very non-sexy and deadly disease. This is the main message we need to get out to the masses.

However, I also agree that this ad represents one of the few occasions when the male tendency to objectify the female body is put to good use, as opposed to selling beer, food or cable packages. And while not all men will be attracted to such an ad for various reasons, it does seem to answer a question that probably nagged breast-cancer-awareness advocates for years: Who doesn’t know about breast cancer and how can we make them interested?

As Janet Jackson’s faux pas proved, the more shocking the footage, the more viewers there will be.

Originally published Sunday, Oct. 11, 2009